Posts by suzi mayhem

33

Prove I'm Not John Cleese-- no 4H-ers, please

by suzi mayhem in

jw
friends

this thread is for those of alleged "fuzzy thinking" who have had it with the bs everywhere else on this discussion bored.

let them have the rest of the bored.

we'll have this lil piece of sanity--on our terms.

suzi mayhem

This thread is for those of alleged "fuzzy thinking" who have had it with the BS everywhere else on this discussion bored. Let them have the rest of the bored. We'll have this lil piece of sanity--on OUR terms.

We're the "freaks" in the Freakdom, and it's high time we had a place to ourselves and by ourselves.

My request is that if you are reading this and think I'm a jackass, kindly leave. Your opinions are not wanted here. No one's asking your opinion.. you can put it on the rest of the bored where they will glorify you and give you thanks like the little gawd you are.

So here's a list of invitees:

GUESTLIST

Dark Clouds+ 1 Friend
Riz+ 1 Friend
Goo+1 Friend + 1 Friend and that friend's girlfriend.. and only if she's hot, and only if it's Tuesday.. :) --and we wanna see pix beforehand!! lol

BugEye+ 1 Friend
Englishman
Patsy
Emyrose
Unanswered

We'll add folks to the list as we see fit, and it will be a unanymous vote by all participants to the New Thread. :)
That being said... First topic of discussion...
Life the Universe and Everything.... (here's a hint, it's a book)

45

ROBOCOP (JanH): PROVE I'M COWBOY

by AcapulcoGold in

jw
friends

robocop i'd hate to see this classic representative gem of your comprehensive stupidity hidden away in some dim dark little recess of this site for you to sneak away from and others not to enjoy:.

"cowboy", a new id here, wrote: .

quote: .

suzi mayhem

AG....

I have to make this quick... the 4H is closing in on me...
Now they think I'm HItler!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! STTTTOOOOPPPPPP
MEINE GOTT!!!!!
Das BOOT!!!
rotfl

Yeah, so how are we all this morning?
I love how people go onto different threads and crucify me for no real reason and without knowing me, and then don't apologise to ME, but to everyone else...
And people wonder why I'm always angry..
AG, anyone prove you're Cowboy yet?
Cowboy, watch out, man, the 4H will make you watch the animal booth at the county fair if you're not careful....
:)

45

ROBOCOP (JanH): PROVE I'M COWBOY

by AcapulcoGold in

jw
friends

robocop i'd hate to see this classic representative gem of your comprehensive stupidity hidden away in some dim dark little recess of this site for you to sneak away from and others not to enjoy:.

"cowboy", a new id here, wrote: .

quote: .

suzi mayhem

Heya, Cowboy,

Welcome to the fray. :)
If you want a taste of the mentality, check out the Suzi Mayhem Outdoes John Cleese thread. I got that joyous welcome after just one post. :)
They REALLY REALLY LOVE ME.
lol
But seriously now, I was also one of Dark Cloud's mistaken identities as well... although I have to say, he's pretty in fishnets, but he's no Tim Curry. ;)
Word of warning, there's always assholes... I won't mention any names, but they all know who they are, and I'm sure I'll be discussion bored gang-banged for this post, too, but hey, free speech, right? Observe. Keep an open mind. And for the love of GaWD and all things holy, don't disagree with them!!!!!
It makes them sit there and look.. geez.. I was gonna say pretty, but as we've seen from pictures... well... you get the idea. :)
If they had personalities to make up for it, it would have been a nicer ride.
As to the bombing, you have my deepest sympathies. There is no real closure for anyone. Eye for an eye philosophies just leave all involved completely blind in the end.

Good luck with the bored. Hope you can take a joke, cuz it seems a lot of it is just that.
To the 4H club, hi, guys!!! Back from Vacation!!! :)
HUGS AND KISSES TO YOU ALL!!!!

Yo, DC, BIG SLOPPY KISSES to you, babycakes. ;)
AG, you go grrl!!

Ciao fer now,
The One with a Life Outside the Box

84

Bonsai Kitty

by suzi mayhem in

jw
friends

ok.. i know i've been a bit of a buster in the past, but this is for real.

there is a site out there, and apparently a demand, for modified housepets.

in a nutshell, what these ahem... [people] do is take a kitten, sedate it, insert the poor thing into a glass bottle with air holes drilled into it, and run tubes into it to feed it, and tubes into it to take care of everything else.

suzi mayhem

Ok.. I know I've been a bit of a buster in the past, but this is for real. There is a site out there, and apparently a demand, for modified housepets.
In a nutshell, what these ahem... [people] do is take a kitten, sedate it, insert the poor thing into a glass bottle with air holes drilled into it, and run tubes into it to feed it, and tubes into it to take care of everything else.
They even have a website to tell you all about it...

http://www.bonsaikitten.com/bkmethod.html

And if you don't believe me, here's the picsa to prove it.

http://www.bonsaikitten.com/gray.html

http://www.bonsaikitten.com/bnw.html

It was bad enough that women had to undergo it due to the times and the "fashions" of the darker ages, but animals don't know any better, and quite frankly, it's just disgusting.
My suggestion would be to let them know at the site exactly what you think, and save those poor cats.

50

what would you do. . .

by dark clouds in

jw
friends

if this happened to you?.

sitting behind my computer a few mornings ago, i was doing the share of reading that i do on a daily basis, sipping my coffee, minding my own, when an instant message appeared on my screen.

call it second nature, i responded as i usually do.

suzi mayhem

Goo, and Yerusalem-- I'm sorry if I butchered your name, hon..

Wow.. For a place that hates me as much as this discussion bored does, I have an equal amount of worshippers... I love it. Thank you for all your support in my campaign for Gawd.

I think the scholars are busy trying to escape the proverbial closet.. :)

MWUAH!!
(And I'd like to thank also this discussion bored for making my site receive 10,000 + more hits per month, looks GREAT for advertising purposes)
You LOVE ME, you really LOVE me!!!
And how I love you all!!! *kisses n hugs*
Dark Clouds... See YOU tonite..
WINK

50

what would you do. . .

by dark clouds in

jw
friends

if this happened to you?.

sitting behind my computer a few mornings ago, i was doing the share of reading that i do on a daily basis, sipping my coffee, minding my own, when an instant message appeared on my screen.

call it second nature, i responded as i usually do.

suzi mayhem

WENDY-- MOMMY? WTF?

Are you lactating out of your restored hymen?
Wow... I'm afraid for your patients--assuming you're a NURSE and NOT a patient.
(I refer to the spine-tingling thriller of the 1920's-- The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, here).
Wow.. and I thought _I_ was prescribed some interesting drugs...
Hon--and this goes for you, too Janh, you schmuck, I'm me, Dark Clouds is HE.
Big difference. I'm inverted, --you know, DOWN THERE--he's not.
:)
And DC, you sly boots... you tryin' to work the magic on me? Turn on some of that hymen-breakin' charm? ;)
Anywhoo...
I just had to make a stand. Mommy-dearest, maybe you should READ the Psych books before assuming you're a Psych Nurse.
And Janh, just cus you stand near a college prof doesn't mean you ARE one. ;) Take a hint and let it die.
I've had to deal with [people] like this at the hospital (I was volunteering, not staying, by the way), and I watched a bunch of "learned professionals" make horrible mistakes in diagnoses... so don't feel bad. Just don't jump all over it, OK? Crazy people have feelings too. And the truly crazy keep beating dead horses about a thousand and eighty-three times on a discussion bored. (yes, i spelled it that way on purpose)
And yes, I'm being extremely random, and utterly disjointed and fragmentary on purpose... Only the TRULY INSANE will understand and reply to my post...
MUHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!
SMOOCHIES AND HUGS TO YOU DARK CLOUDS! I'll see you tonite-- through a pair of brand-new binoculars.. ;)

22

INTERNET SECURITY

by Amazing in

jw
friends

hey all: this is short and good i recently had a total crash on my pc.

i built the thing myself, and it used to run like a race horse.

but, unknown to me, my old anti-virus program was not updated due to my subscription running out, and my getting lazy about staying watchful.. so, i installed a new security program.

suzi mayhem

Amazing,

Be careful that one of the viruses didn't attack your Anti-virus software. DC and I (OK, jig's up, we live together, for those who didn't already figure THAT one out, and yeah, we're going out)
had some issues on my computer within the past couple weeks where Norton started to put up a block on startup. Me being the patient person that I am scanned the drives with said Norton, and it said it was clean. I then tried Disk Doctor, same results, but the silly thing kept jumping in on startup. Soooo...
Again being the patient person that I am, I scanned the file codes that I needed, made sure there was nothing untoward in them, then saved em on backup as much as I could save. Then I trashed the hard drive. :) Wiped it clean, updated the OS, and rescanned everything via hotmail attachment (that's how I saved what I needed, btw).
Haven't had too many problems until we came back to this board... people will remain nameless as far as MY suspicions, but it's kinda coincidental how this all started right around the time that Chuck found this place...
Things that make you go..... HMMMMMMMMMmmmmmm...

Internet Security is such a pain. For those folks who are po' like me, use a hotmail account and you get free updated virus scans on every attachment. Kinda nice.
Also, as a word of caution, I wouldn't set up a shared folder or Direct IM connection on your PC without knowing the people first. There's waaay too many backdoors to these things, and once you have the connection established, you pretty much have to shut the silly thing down to break it, and by then they could have pushed anything through.
Another precaution is to set your cookies for permissions. I know it sounds silly, but in your internet preferences you can set your Browser up to ask you before it accepts cookies-- bits of a program that support a bigger aspect of a site.

I think that about covers things.
I remember back in the day when this internet thing was just starting up.. It was pretty cool.
Now it's like wearing a chum belt in a shark pool at feeding time.
Ciao all. Til I get the new job I and get relocated after the first, I prolly won't be on much to be my usual charming self.. :)

50

what would you do. . .

by dark clouds in

jw
friends

if this happened to you?.

sitting behind my computer a few mornings ago, i was doing the share of reading that i do on a daily basis, sipping my coffee, minding my own, when an instant message appeared on my screen.

call it second nature, i responded as i usually do.

suzi mayhem

OK, Dark Clouds,

SORRY for trying to have cyber with you.. it was ME it was ALL MY FAULT
I AM THE SCAPEGOAT KOO KOO KACHOO!!!!
:)
Just kidding, but next time I guess I'll just have to cum over to your house and SPANK you in PERSON... You won't say no THEN, I bet... ooooohhhh
ROTFL

Seriously, though, I just HATE getting stalked, be it online or IRL.
Like this one guy, he wanted to spend ALL this MONEY on me and dress me up and take me out to fancy dinners and castles, and I was all like... EEEeeew... freak!
Good luck with all that, I hope yer stalker doesn't wanna be all nice and generous.. that would just be gross. :)

SMOOCHIES!

122

Suzi Mayhem Outdoes John Cleese

by AlanF in

jw
friends

a critique of suzi mayhem's theory of god .

i thought, when suzi first posted this, that it was a joke something like john cleese's classic "brontosaurus theory" skit in a monty python episode.

but mr. "dark clouds" has sort of asked me to critique it as if it were a serious theory, so here goes.. i'll address this to suzi, but suzi dear, don't take this too seriously.

suzi mayhem

I now pronounce this particular horse to be of the DEAD KIND.

Thank you.

*taking a smartass bow*

122

Suzi Mayhem Outdoes John Cleese

by AlanF in

jw
friends

a critique of suzi mayhem's theory of god .

i thought, when suzi first posted this, that it was a joke something like john cleese's classic "brontosaurus theory" skit in a monty python episode.

but mr. "dark clouds" has sort of asked me to critique it as if it were a serious theory, so here goes.. i'll address this to suzi, but suzi dear, don't take this too seriously.

suzi mayhem

Woooooww.... And to think I wasn't gonna bother coming back here to verbalize with a bunch of ign'ant yahoos...
But you guys are just gluttons for punishment... (much like my Friday night gatherings... lol)
Alan.. you smoothie.. I must have really pissed you off to make you start an entire discussion THREAD based on me and my theory... as a matter of fact, you dumbshit, I presented my theory at a chat at NYU (That would be NEW YORK UNIVERSITY, by the way, or should I spell it fuh-net-i-kal-lee for you "clear thinkers"?). And gee.. guess what? My hungover fuzzy thinking self got presented to a congregation of "clear thinking" doctors of physics and metaphysics for my "fuzzy" theory. AHEM.
And as to being "fuzzy".. Do I have to say it again? I don't think I would have been able to get my masters of science if I was so damned fuzzy... shitheads...

Oh, and Sick of Nine.. or whatever sadass trekkie yer trying to be...
"hehh hehh hehh... I'm like.. heh .... six of nine... cuz it ..hehh h he... sounds like ..heh hheh... sixty-nine.. but huh.. I'm like.. heh... still a virgin, YEAH! .. heh hhh e ... and i base my thought on Beavis and Butthead.. heh h he...
Who's Einstein? heh hehh e... isn't he like.. huh... some dead guy? hehh hehhhehehehheheheh..."

And just for the record, hon... I don't WEAR underwear.... ;)
And I thought you kids were sposed to be the free-thinkers.. yet you sold your imaginations for logic... and, sorry to say, whoever made that transaction got the better end of the deal, cuz logic you ain't got. And even Einstein failed basic math... DUH.

But thanks for the compliment, kiddies.. I had a lot of fun shoving that stick further up yer asses... :) And I love John Cleese.. THERE's an intelligent man, and everyone thought Monty Python in their time were a bunch of babbling idiots, too..... hmmm...
So by your discussion and attempt at berating.... logically (and here I mean REAL PEOPLE logic) I'm a GENIUS. :)
Thankee kindly.
You shure do know how ta show a grrl a good time... and if you wanna get beaten by a grrl, well.. meet me at the clubs Friday night and I'll be glad to show you what fuzzy thinking can do when it's backed by a horsewhip.

*SMOOOCHIES!*

Love, Lust, and Lollipops,

The Mistress of Mayhem, Suzi M.
aka The Second Coming ;)
(think about THAT one while you sleep tonite, you sorry sons of bitches.. it really COULD be true according to quite a few varied prophesies...... ooooohhhhh... scary! ;) )

"Wasted views.. that's all they see
blue hot blood guilt optic nerve
with the right attitude
you will succeed
blue self-abusive recluse
too late for me
make shifting peace
settling crazy things.... keep your eyes open
soft-spoken changes nothing...
A View So Cruel... "

--Nivek Ogre